14 Jan
Posted in: parenting
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Insights From a Tween

Sometimes I forget my 11-year-old is turning into quite the little man. This morning he shared some tween insights with me. I’m not sure he intentionally planned the pep talk or if it was just a case of his sarcastic nature. I feel as if I underestimate him a good portion of the time. For every 20 moments where I don’t feel like I’m doing anything right with this parenting gig, there’s one amazing moment where I am reminded my efforts and energy are far from wasted.

snow on tree

It snowed last night. I shouldn’t have been surprised. It’s winter in Wyoming. It snows. I was under the impression we were just going to get a dusting of snow, not enough snow to require shoveling or snow plows. Not the kind of snow that turns the world eerily quiet and leaves the sky feeling heavy and white. When I’m not prepared for snow, it slows me down. I forget how to get ready in the morning and out the door. Everything seems more difficult and slower…so slow. I have to fight the urge to wrap everyone in a giant fluffy blanket and cuddle on the couch reading or watching movies.

I was having a hard time kicking myself in gear this morning. I stood in our front room with a steaming cup of coffee and watched the snowplow pile a heaping mound of fresh snow into the middle of our road. Then I just kept standing there, staring and sipping coffee. B came and stood beside me, not saying a peep for a few seconds.

B: “What are you doing?”
Me: “Getting motivated.”
B: “Are you sick?”
Me: “No, just uninspired this morning. I don’t want to do anything.”
B: “But we have to, right?”
Me: “There are people who would say yes. We have to get on with our Tuesday. I can’t just stop because I don’t feel like it anymore. Sometimes it’s just hard to get things going.”
B: “Drudgery.”
Me: a little shocked that he gets what his mama is talking about “Perfect word…drudgery. It just seems like the grind of today could wait. I just want to pretend there isn’t anything to do. Lock the doors, shut the curtains, and pretend we have NOTHING to do today….just nothing.” sigh
B: “I could go back to bed and stay in pajamas all day long.”
Me: “Exactly.”
B: “What about those people who we see on Tuesdays that did get fired up today and got moving? How will they feel if we chose not to do today? It’s probably a little disrespectful to their time to just curl up on the couch because we didn’t feel like doing Tuesday.” smile
Me: “How did you get so smart?”
B: “Sometime I listen to my parents.” nudge me with his shoulder
Me: “Go get dressed. We have a Tuesday to do.”

I would love to say I leap out of bed in the morning ecstatic for another day. I don’t though. I get bogged down and overwhelmed by responsibilities, my to-do list and the general upkeep for our family. I want to throw the covers over my head and pretend my day is entirely my own to do with as I choose. B helped shake me out of my reverie. The day-to-day tasks aren’t glamorous, but this IS all that I want to do. Raising up our four children in a happy, healthy home is my dream. It’s flawed and riddled with imperfections and mistakes, but loving them is the reason I’m doing this Tuesday. Loving them and a well-timed talk from a boy who is wiser than his mama gives him credit for.

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